When You Can’t Let Go
Posted by Gail | Filed under Life Lessons
Moving has a way of putting things in perspective. When I moved from Toronto to my house in the country, I packed for weeks. We had born two children in our Toronto home and we had a lot of crap to prove we’d been in one place for a decade. While I’m pretty good at giving stuff away, I did end up taking more than of couple of boxes of stuff to the new house that I might need someday.
There were clothes that would fit me if I ever lost the baby weight I’d gained with Alex. Fat chance! There were games we had acquired over the years that we’d have plenty of time to play now that we’d be living in the country. There were videos the children had watched, that I was going to save for when little kids came to our house with weekend visitors. There were all the picture books I had lovingly chosen for my children that I just couldn’t part with. There were dishes, glasses, tablecloths, cookie tins. We could use these older blankets for all the picnics we’d be going on in the countryside. We would finally find a use for the silver punch bowl when we had parties in our new home. And that beautiful china set I’d received from marriage #2 would fit perfectly in our new sideboard, which I was buying because I needed a place to store that beautiful china set.
Someday Syndrome had reared it’s ugly head again, this time convincing me that at some point I might need all this stuff, and it would be cheaper to keep it and cart it around that to repurchase it if I actually ever needed it. Hmmm.
I found the move exhausting. Part of it was the stress of moving, managing two young children, selling a home in the city, buying a home in the country and not having a clue what would come next. But part of it was definitely dealing with all the STUFF. I swore the next time I moved it would be in a pine box!
Life does what life does and five years later I was MOVING AGAIN! This time I was much more picky about what I took with. I didn’t pack a single thing that I wasn’t going to use with some frequency… except the china set…what is it with that china set?… and everything settled into its place in my new home quite easily. I shook free of Someday Syndrome by using three simple questions to keep myself on track:
1. What will it cost to replace it? One of the biggest barriers to giving stuff away is that sense that as soon as you do, you’re going to wish you still had it because you’ve come up with a great use for it. If you’re debating getting rid of a very expensive item, this may give you pause to think… maybe that’s my china debate. But so often the stuff we keep isn’t worth the cost of moving it, the space it takes to store it, or the mental energy to keep it in inventory.
2. Can someone else use it today? If you have a half-dozen cookie cans you’ve collected because you’ll bake cookies every Christmas and gift them to family and friends… someday… maybe… ask yourself if Aunty Barb, who does bake cookies every Christmas, could actually use those cans. Then give ‘em to her. Give the clothes that don’t fit to friends or charity. Give the videos, DVDs, and CDs to your local library where hundreds of people can enjoy them, as opposed to them collecting dust in your house. If you aren’t using it, are you keeping it because you’re afraid you’ll never be able to afford to buy it again? Relax, you’re going to be able to have whatever you want, if you can make space in your life for new abundance. Let someone else enjoy the stuff now so you don’t have to dust it.
3. Will I even remember that I have it? We have loads of stuff we can’t even remember we have. How many lipsticks do you have in how many different colours? How many pairs of shoes, blouses, cake tins, plastic containers, tools, gardening implements…? Keeping stuff around is no guarantee that you’ll remember you have it (or can find it) when you actually need it. Someday items have a funny way of duplicating themselves: first you have one, then another (because you forgot you had the first one) and then another (because you couldn’t find it when you needed it so you went ahead and bought it again.) That’s how people end up with multiples of things, some of which they hardly ever use.
Letting go can be really hard. But it can also be phenomenally empowering. When you let go of the stuff you might need someday, you’re telling yourself and the universe that you’ll be able to deal with whatever comes your way… that you don’t need the STUFF to see you through. You’ll figure out a solution.
May 4, 2009 at 7:09 am
How timely!
We’re prepping our house for sale right now, and we have implemented one hard and fast rule: “Do I want to haul this with me across the planet?”
If the answer is no, out it goes! “Out”, of course, being garbage, recycling, Value Village, friends/family, etc. We aren’t complete monsters!
May 4, 2009 at 7:39 am
I get it about the china set!
I got married at 21 (more years ago than I will say!) and I’m sure that if I had grown up a couple of years before we got married, I would have known myself enough to say that I didn’t need to register for china. We had 9 place settings and several extra serving pieces.
Fast forward all these years, and we’ve used the china 3 (three!) times. I loved the pattern though, and family and friends had given it to me. I moved that china 4 times!
I found out by chance last year that a co-worker had the exact same pattern, was lamenting that she did not have enough place settings, and the only serving piece that we both had, she had recently broken. It took me some time to be okay with it, but I checked with hubs to see how he felt about it, and made a deal to sell that china. I can’t believe how freeing it was once it was gone. I had room for things I used, and I know the china is actually going to be used… Plus, I had a few hundred dollars to put towards the debt repayment. :0)
May 4, 2009 at 7:55 am
We did a major renovation of our house almost 3 years ago – major in that we had to move out and in with my inlaws and then tore the house down and built it again. I am a pack rat. I admit it. I had things from my university days – text books and such. I swallowed hard and out they went – well except a couple of the books which I kept but there were more that went out that stayed. I had had twins. I gained weight and changed jobs where I didn’t need my “office” clothes. They didn’t fit and neither did my high heels (amazing how your feet can change after babies). Out they went to the Sally Ann. Good thing because even now they still wouldn’t fit and I didn’t have to store them for the 9 months that the reno took.
I am now starting to come to the realize that we really do have a lot of things in the crawl space that should find its way out of the house – soon, ok maybe in waves when I can come to grips that it needs to go since the twins haven’t seen those toys in the 3 years that its been packed up to be stored during the reno.
I’ll get there. One day. :0)
I just have to make sure my daughters are not around – they are worse than me! :0)
May 4, 2009 at 7:58 am
Once again, you’re right on the money Gail!
We downsized in the fall from a 3 bedroom townhouse to a 3 bedroon apartment, in order to reduce our living expenses. I got rid of alot of STUFF then, but I have recently come to a realization that there is so much more that we can do without. You know unneeded stuff becomes a problem when it prevents you from finding the stuff you really do need and use!
Our apartment building managers allow a giant yard sale once per year, which is coming up in just under 3 weeks. This gives me just enough time to sort through all the baby items, unworn clothes, and assorted items that are cluttering up our life. All our personal proceeds will be divided into: 1) Debt repayment; 2) Emergency Fund; & 3) Planned spending.
When we move again in about 2 years time, I don’t want to be moving all this useless junk with me, without ever having used it. If someone else has a use for it now, it would be better off in their hands/closet/garden shed/attic than mine.
May 4, 2009 at 8:05 am
I can always let go, especially after living out of a hotel for a year with nothing but a suitcase.
It made me realize that my stuff in my apartment, was just stuff. I could live without it , and I felt freer, NOT to have things.
In fact, now I’m on this thing, to put my life into 3 suitcases and 2 carryons. So far, so good.
I’m at 2 suitcases and 2 carryons (carryons for technology I don’t want to check into baggage).
And I think I’d like to keep to that kind of mentality for the rest of my life: 3 suitcases, 2 carryons, so I can always pack and move without having to worry about all my STUFF accumulating in the home.
May 4, 2009 at 8:07 am
Great topic. Hanging onto too much stuff seems to fall into two categories: 1. I might need it later / this might be useful and 2. memories. Both have easy solutions as you said. Truly needed items can be replaced. And memories can be stored on microchips. Someone once told me that if you get rid of all your stuff, you’d only ever remember or wish for 20% back. As a reformed hoarder/collector of way too much stuff, I’d say for me it’s about 5%. The freedom gained from having less stuff to clean/sort/move/hunt through is invaluable.
May 4, 2009 at 9:01 am
Years ago I found myself in a situation of having to sell off a house full of stuff in order to move forward. It felt awful. I felt an overwhelming loss. I didn’t know how I would ever recover from having to sell everything. Imagine how surprised I was that once it was over I felt extreme relief. It was like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I was free to make decisions and options were opened to me. I couldn’t believe that the loss that I had been feeling was clouding my judgment and negatively affecting my decision making. And guess what? It all boiled down to the fact that I was allowing the loss of a couch, a washer and dryer, a bed to affect major life decisions. I gave the stuff in my life more power than it ever deserved, and it was only by selling it all that I was able to get that power back. It was a wonderful life lesson. Hard to go through, but one of those “HAHA” moments.
Here is what I have learned. Stuff is just stuff. Having more of it doesn’t mean diddly squat. Having expensive stuff just means it cost you more, it doesn’t make the stuff more important. So do yourself a favour today and be good to yourself by putting you first. Use those 800 thread count sheets everyday. Ditto with the Egyptian cotton towels. And for goodness sakes take out the china and use it today. Trust me, even if it is for kraft dinner, it will taste better on your china. Be good to yourself by giving yourself permission to use your stuff. You will be glad that you did.
May 4, 2009 at 9:21 am
I used to be a save it!! ohhhh the memories! kind of girl. I had boxes and boxes of things I kept for Someday though that day never came. Then having two teen/almost teen boys in a 850 sq ft house did a great reality check on me. I have NO room.
I started to become a purger. Nothing gives me greater pleasure now than to see bags and boxes of stuff go out of the house. Every summer I spend a week or so going through things and getting rid of stuff. Twice a year the boys go through their clothes and give what doesn’t fit to a family in need who lives near my sister.
I pitched the wedding cards from a zillion years ago and the university texts. The novels I am having a harder time with.
I try valiantly to become a ‘one in/one out’ kind of girl. The holdback is the spouse, who does not throw anything out ever. He has boxes of stuff he’s not used since the first time he got it…papers he might need Someday…old raggedy rock concert tshirts, that I’m sorry…haven’t fit him in 20 years. I don’t think I’ll convert him.
May 4, 2009 at 9:23 am
Once I was friends with a woman in another country who measured her riches in the things she learned and did rather than what she owned. I visited her house, it was beautiful but she told me none of it meant anything to her. All the modern architecture and lovely things were actually her husband’s. I asked her why she didn’t care about it. She said she was happy enough, especially since she had her studies, but her marriage, which was arranged, brought with it her in-laws. Her mother-in-law, who was a chain smoker and not altogether with it, had (several years before this conversation) burned the house and everything in it to the ground. They rebuilt. They all still live together. The mother-in-law still regularly falls asleep with a lit cigarette (my friend wondered if her architect husband could invent a bed installed in a wading pool). She realized how little happiness has to do with what you are surrounded by and how much with what you hold inside you…
May 4, 2009 at 10:07 am
Thanks for sharing this post Gail. It identifies itself well for all those “collectors” (i.e. hoarders) such as myself (yes, guity as charged) who have a difficult time to just let go. When I moved a few months ago, it was difficult to purge through things that I never purged through before. Some stuff was easier than others, some not so much. I got rid of about 5 bags of clothes (I knew I didn’t have much clothes, but didn’t realize it was that much!?), and carried about 22 boxes (my life more or less) to the new place. I still carried my university textbooks from two different degrees. Why? Not sure…guess one can never know when that info will come handy – although given the subjects, I probably won’t. I regret partly that I didn’t sell my textbooks while they were still “good” – now I couldn’t sell them if I wanted to because they’re “outdated”. I guess I enjoy holding onto them because they’re symbols of knowledge. *shrugs* How many people would have a biochemistry textbook sitting on their shelf?
Like old relationships, the toughest part of the process is just letting go. How to do it though, hopefully, only time will tell. Maybe one day, I’ll be able to pack my life into 3 suitcases and 2 carry-ons. For now, I’ll just have to settle to the fact that I’m emotionally attached to most of my things.
Thanks to everyone for sharing your words (before me and after me). I have learned much by reading Gail’s thoughts and the thoughts of her loyal followers.
May 4, 2009 at 10:28 am
And the “Something in/something out” rule applies with me. It’s so easy to accumulate things again.
May 4, 2009 at 10:43 am
Thanks Gail! I have decided to simplify my life. I have never been able to deal very well with ‘things’ and so have regularly cleared out my house of extra items about every six months. However, recently, I had ‘bugs’ infiltrate my kitchen cupboards and after cleaning out foodstuffs that I haven’t used in a long time, I am giving my baking tins away. New frozen entrees and desserts have really improved over the years with lower fat, lower salt and lower sugars and I won’t be buying the flours, sugars, spices, herbs and sauces or the meats that become freezer-burnt before they are even used. My small freezer will be donated to family and I am disposing ‘I should’ from my vocabulary. It is such a liberating feeling and my family won’t be any worse for the changes I am making since they have long-ago flown the nest and have babies of their own now. It is amazing how long it has taken me to update my life to my new reality!
I gave up cable and the internet just this month and during the regular Sunday visits by my family, I now don’t have to compete with the children’s programming on tv for their attention so I am really happy to have done this.
May 4, 2009 at 10:48 am
You’re right, Gail, most of our “stuff” we forget about, until we move and come face to face with everything we own. All of a sudden we concoct a reason why we will need it someday.
I just took a big pile of clothes to the consignment store. It was tough. I had designer jeans and dresses that were beautiful but that I just don’t fit into anymore, and probably won’t ever again. And in my late 20s, I’m far less prone to wear mini-halter dresses anyway! (as in, I don’t and I won’t.) Nevertheless, giving up “stuff” that you have an attachment to is hard.
I have moved so many times – on average about once a year for the last 8 years – that I purge stuff regularly. Occasionally I get rid of stuff I regret, but mostly I appreciate living a more simplified life.
Last time we moved we hired movers and I reminded myself that every item I took with me i was PAYING to have it moved. That sure brought things into perspective.
People tend to comment on how spacious and simple our new condo is. Other couples might be keen to have more stuff on display. The truth is, I wanted it this way. I wanted to enjoy the open space, the simplicity, and fill our home with love, and peace, not clutter it up with “stuff.” Living the simple life works for me.
May 4, 2009 at 11:04 am
PS Colin – I love your comment!
May 4, 2009 at 11:11 am
Starting next week my husband and I are going to start renovating our downstairs and hopefully we can get rid of alot of stuffs. I have bins and bins under my stairway of stuff saved from my kids childhood. They are now in the thirties so it is time to get rid of it. I know it will be hard but must be done. Wish me luck that I can do this
May 4, 2009 at 11:15 am
Saver Queen-I had the same issue with “paying per pound” for moving when my husband and I relocated from Northwestern Ontario to Southwestern Ontario 3 years ago (about 18 hr drive for those outside the province). It was amazing how many things I got rid of that I thought I “needed” (old greeting cards, class notes from undergrad, articles from grad school-oh, the pounds of paper I freed from my life!) I’ve only missed one thing that I wanted from all that stuff, but I rationalize that had I kept it, it would be in a box, difficult to access, so I wouldn’t really “have it” at all. My dilemma with the papers was that I thought that it was irreplaceable-silly me, the internet has most of the info I would ever dream of needing, and the stuff I wrote down from class is outdated anyway.
I still probably have too much stuff, but I’m slowly getting better at purging. My mom has been purging like crazy to prepare for a move next year, and I’m trying to follow her lead. She is giving away things to people that will use them, and if they don’t want them, she gives it to charity. I know I’m due for a major purge, so I will have a garage sale this summer to motivate me! Thanks for the reminder Gail.
May 4, 2009 at 11:26 am
One day I was just going through somethings and got rid of it and it felt great. So I just kept going and everyday since then I have got rid of one or two items a day. Whatever I can take out and put back in 15 mins (closet, cupboard or drawer) and I have to get rid of something! I have been doing this for about two and half years now and starting to slow down not too much else to go out! It is so much easier to CLEAN with not to many nick nacks around. I just kept what I love! The “in-out rule” is the key here. I have mentioned what I have been doing to clients and friends and some are doing the same now. It feels great and not overwhelming!
May 4, 2009 at 11:44 am
My issue with “stuff” showed up as soon as everyone in my family started passing away… my brother and I inherited all this ’stuff’! It’s great that we have some memories and antques, but what to do with it all?! We have my mother’s dolls from the late 20s etc. I find that the “dust collectors” are the biggest downfall.
I have learned that if I can’t eat it, wear it or utilize it in any way, then it doesn’t get ‘purchased’. I grew up living in a house, but as a young adult up until now.. years later, I’ve lived in apts with much less room to spread out and yet I still manage to have quite a bit of ’stuff’. I love purging when Spring Cleaning fever hits me. There is nothing better than putting aside quiet time to go through closets, drawers, whole rooms, etc.. just to find items and think, “do I *really* need this?” It gives me a great sense of control and satisfaction. Goodwill must know my car quite well by now.
May 4, 2009 at 12:04 pm
I’ve done the purging several times. First when my parents were selling my childhood home (I had lived there all my life and had a lot of stuff). I purged stuff I hadn’t even remembered I owned. My mom opened a box of her papers – it was all stuff from the 1970s on childrearing and she was reluctant to throw them out in case I needed them.
After I was finished laughing I told her I think I could get literature that was a little more up-to-date whenever I did have kids.
When I went back to school I took only what I needed (I moved frequently) and ended up storing the rest at my parents cottage. I decided when I moved to Toronto two years ago (and am planning to stay) that I would go through the boxes again and purge. I mean, I had been living for several years without them, so were they really that valuable and necessary in my life (aside from certain sentimental things). Plus, I had to cart the darn things so the less I took with me the better! I ended up getting rid of a lot of decor/household items and books I had kept since university.
But it is amazing what we accumulate – I mean how many candle holders does one really need? and papers…geez, no paper company is going out of business while I’m around.
May 4, 2009 at 12:12 pm
I gave away a lot of stuff… maternity stuff.. baby stuff… and now I am regretting it as I just recently found out that I’m pregnant (surprise) with our third child. I guess I can hit all the goodwill stores that I gave it away too and get it all back! Smile.
May 4, 2009 at 12:37 pm
I’m making slow progress here. Going through things – sold some to an antique dealer, others went to auction. Hated giving up my great grandmothers sewing machine…..gathering for a yard sale soon. I’m sadly too sentimental….
Check out this site:
http://www.flylady.net/pages/FLYingLessons_Decluttertips.asp
May 4, 2009 at 1:01 pm
I think that “Can someone else use it today?” and “Will I even remember that I have it?” are great questions. I’ve considered replacement cost before, but I’m not sure I’ve asked those ones.
I have two small children, and so our current inventory includes a lot of maternity and baby stuff. Since we’re not moving I’m holding on to it for now, I’m pretty sure I would be kicking myself if another little one came my way and I no longer had my baby bath. But in general I love getting rid of stuff I don’t need. It feels very liberating to me, like I’ve just lost a bunch of weight that was holding me down.
May 4, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Just don’t forget to actually use that china set. My mom read Rohinton Mistry’s _Family Matters_ and ever since has been using her china on a daily basis in order to enjoy it as much as she can.
Live in the moment and use (or lose) your crap… errr, stuff!
May 4, 2009 at 1:22 pm
Wow, good post and lots of thought processes here. I am a third (at least) generation hoarder. I do a lot of crafts, and recycle a lot of things, including old jeans, fur coats, etc. Therefore, if anyone who knows me has anything they are purging, I get the call – can I use _____? It took me a while, but I am finally saying, “No, I have 43 fur coats waiting their turn to be made into teddy bears”! My grandmother was a ‘recycler’ as well, making quilts out of everything and anything. She passed away 31 years ago, and my aunt recently gave me several boxes of pre-cut recycled clothes, ready for sewing – that are at least 50+ years old!!! I did manage to find some rickrack from the 30’s in grandma’s box that went on Raggedy Ann’s apron, but I bit the bullet, and threw those boxes out (after storing them for a few years). I would love to be able to pack up and move in a day or less, but on the other hand, I was thrilled when my mom re-gifted me with a home made Mother’s Day card I had made as a child – using fabrics to make a female body (my fashion designing started young), and my very first pay stub! I remember how rich I felt to be making $1.94/hour!!! Where does one draw the line? In 1994 my former husband decided we should move from Regina to Edmonton. I had just had knee surgery, and he was already in Edmonton working, so a mover was hired. The truck wasn’t big enough, they had to get another trailer to attach!! Unloading in Edmonton, I got to sit on a chair and be the ‘recorder’, verifying boxes and where they went. We had almost 500 boxes of ’stuff’ and over half of that was my craft paraphernalia!! That was a wake up call for me, especially considering the eventual move back to Saskatchewan, (my parents came, we had two vans, and a half ton truck with topper, and Dad and I had to go rent a U-Haul to add to the truck) (and I had sold most of my big furniture to make the move easier – HA!) and how many of those boxes haven’t hardly been opened yet. I am in the process of moving now, and seriously deciding if I am ever going to recycle this or that. A huge garage sale is in my summer plans, and I am going to focus on only keeping craft supplies for what I intend to produce in the next little while. I too have all my college books, for God knows what reason, because I am not even working in my ‘field’, and those books are also outdated. The one thing I have trouble getting rid of is pictures of my sons. You know, the WalMart packages, where you get a gazillion different size pics, and can’t give them all away? Reading another post, though, from the other day got me thinking. One poster commented on the fire down east, where they were evacuated. She grabbed important papers, etc., and away they went. When your life is put in a nutshell like that, it makes you realize what is really important, and what should be so easy to purge. BUT, where do they come up with all those old props for movies, etc? Somebody had to have stored that stuff somewhere……
May 4, 2009 at 4:21 pm
The hardest things for me to purge are things that my Mother has given me. I lost her in my early 20s and my way of ‘keeping her with me’ was to keep EVERYTHING associated with her from the letters and cards she sent me to the tacky (mom, don’t strike me down) holiday themed items she would send me (ceramic easter basket anyone?). A few years ago I challanged my fiancee to purge his belongings when we were preparing to move. As he was donating his records and books, he asked me if I was planning to do any purging of my own. I was stunned, he couldn’t be asking for me to get rid of my memories of my mother. I was stunned. Then as I was thinking horrible, nasty thoughts about him, it hit me, It wasn’t my memories I was getting rid of, I would always have those but just the physical items associated with them. My first purging session was difficult, like losing her again (memories can do that to a person) but once it was done, I felt, Nothing and that was great. No guilt and no grief.
Once I had a taste of that, there was no stopping me. I purge regularly now, clothing, kitchen items, food to foodbanks, books, etc. I still struggle with associating memories with items but what can I say, I am a work in progress!!!!
May 4, 2009 at 4:26 pm
When my husband and I hit the 20 year marriage mark (now heading for 22), I had a yard sale and was able to sell off a lot of the what I called the “outer level junk”. This is the junk hiding the “inner level junk”. Last year I could get to the “inner level junk” and had another sale. At the end of this month I’m participating in a church yard sale and able to finally bring my regular junk. What was an interesting task to go through was reviewing many wedding gifts we had received in 1987 but never used but didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings by letting them go. We decided on one rule of thumb for many of them… we had a number of gifts from couples who were no longer together, had remarried and a few started second families. We figured they wouldn’t even remember what they gave us and if we weren’t using it, it was time to let it go.
May 4, 2009 at 5:59 pm
I am a purger. An organized space is a relaxing space……ahh….
I sometimes in the past got rid of things and then wondered if I acted too quick. Now when I do go on a purging spree I have 4 piles, keep, give away, throw out and death row. If I have something that I can’t quite decide on it goes to death row for 6 months. If I don’t use it in 6 months, I probably never will, so I get rid of it. I keep death row stuff all together and use it as a starting point for the next purge.
I have a theory that when I purge I remember the long forgotten item and then inadvertently think of a use for it a week later. If I never purged, I wouldn’t have thought about it or ever needed it. With death row, I have it to use and miss the second guessing of what I threw out and needed.
May 4, 2009 at 6:08 pm
Our church sends over new and gently worn clothes to missionaries in Africa.
2 years ago, one of our church members put in her wedding dress and off it went. We got a wonderful letter back from the missionary stating that over 6 women had used the dress in their wedding days and were absolutely thrilled to have a white dress.
What a wonderful way to reuse something that hangs in a closet.
May 4, 2009 at 8:21 pm
I have come to believe that if something is being left in a box, or closet and hasn’t seen the light of day, then you are doing that item/memory an injustice. If you truly wanted to respect your “stuff” it would be out and visible, showing it the respect it deserves. That makes it easy for me to let go of “stuff” that are in boxes, gathering dust.
I have always been able to let go of things, and rarely do I ever regret doing so.
May 4, 2009 at 8:57 pm
Did some spring cleaning of my closet. 2 big garbage bags full of clothes and shoes. I now have 3 empty rubbermaid boxes. So going to get my 72hr emergency prepareness kit together. It’s ER Prepareness week this week May 3-9th.
May 4, 2009 at 9:07 pm
Great timing! We had a community garage sale on Saturday, and after an hour I was ready to be done. So I put a large free sign in front of all the small stuff. My neighbours thought I made a ton of money since everyone kept stopping, and taking. Additionally people then took time to look at the bigger items and buy them! Yeah! Doing daycare I had accumulated a tonne of stuff, most of it given to me. Life is about paying it forward…so 2 double strollers offered on Freecycle and a double jogger offered to a friend. I don’t need them at the moment, so what is the point of storing them? I find that clutter and “stuff” is stressful.
May 5, 2009 at 2:16 pm
Hello Everyone,
Now I have my own set that I received which I use a few times a yr for the same occasions 
I’m glad I have them since I’m caring on a family tradition 
which makes the celebration more special 
and memorable….
I’ve lived in our first home for two years now and since we’ve moved from our rental… I go though our stuff that we’ve hadn’t use for six months to a year.. My Mom notice that I keep moving things on that I haven’t use for yrs or months and I don’t need in my new home… It’s seems to be always a few boxes or bags of stuff every few months.. I notice I had a lot of stuff when I moved out of my small bedroom from my parents house and over filled a car with my stuff which doesn’t include no bed, no dresser.. Just clothes, junk (got rid alot of it) and crafts that I’m still into…
We now have just a normal size closet in the master bedroom and I don’t buy any new clothing unless something is worn out (don’t like it anymore) to replace it.. With our house warming party I had with my family I made a big thing that we have a small closet and using one dresser between the two of us which they didn’t believe me that I would stick to it… (We’ve stuck to it) But we have a spare bedroom with an empty dresser and closet for when we have guests over… My rule in the home is: DON’T HAVE A PLACE FOR IT MOVE IT ON! HAVEN’T USE IT IN SIX MONTHS! Give it away… That has kept my home more clutter free
For those who own china dishes! My parents own a big set that the family use for Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving and sometimes birthday though out the year.
May 21, 2009 at 2:02 am
[...] of Till Debt Do Us Part. Recently I thought two of her posts were fitting to link from here. When You Can’t Let Go talks about how hard it is to let go of our stuff and the three questions you can ask yourself to [...]
May 24, 2009 at 7:18 am
I really enjoyed reading these responses. We have recently moved into a bigger house but the bedrooms are bigger and the living areas all one space…..and i LOVE it!!!!
There is absolutely nowhere to store anything and over twelve months later hubby and i are still purging stuff from the old place. (we brought a property alongside our original one and now instead of having stuff at both places it is all in one spot and we are slowly purging through it all.
We usually have a small skip each month filled with wood, steel, junk and house rubbish. Today went out old bike parts and old carpet.
With the kids they only have a small built in wardrobe each, and i am always going thru their clothes. I love the feeling of puttin stuff into goodwill or sharing old videos and dvds to the library, craft stuff to the school.
I msold my daughters pushbike and she still hasnt realised it has gone…and that was a couple months ago LOL
May 26, 2009 at 10:05 pm
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