Pleasures
Posted by Gail | Filed under Balance, Life Lessons
I have a line on my budget called “Pleasures.” It’s where I put the money I spend getting a massage, buying those delicious ginger/peach candles and anything else that I want to splurge on in a month. I guess I should put all the wonderful teas I buy under this category, but I put them under “food” leaving more space for self-indulgence (as long as I stay within my pre-set parameters for both).
Journalists are always asking me what I spend money on, I guess because I’m The Debtonator! (my sound-guy, John, came up with that one), and I’m constantly signing the “don’t spend money you don’t have” song. But there are things I love to do, so I budget for them. And I set some money aside each month for things I just feel like splurging on.
As long as you’re not going into debt, and you’ve got all your bases covered – including long-term savings, your emergency fund, your insurance needs – you can spend your money on anything you want. Want to travel? Go. Want to drink expensive coffee? Do it. Want to buy a new sumthin’or’nother? G’head. You work hard for your money and you should enjoy the pleasures it can bring you.
The only time spending becomes a problem is when you do it unconsciously and it interferes with your financial goals. You can’t eat out four nights a week if you want to save up a downpayment on a home. And you can’t buy everything your heart desires if you have no emergency fund. Take care of the details and then you can go shopping guilt-free.
What if you’re still experiencing pangs when you buy yourself the extras? It could be a couple of things:
Maybe you’ve been in austerity mode for so long you need to readjust to the idea that you can afford to splurge now, or
Maybe you shouldn’t be buying what you’re buying because there are other, more important things that should come first.
Keep in mind that for your pleasures to feel like pleasures, you can’t do them too often. If you love picking up a magazine at the checkout to enjoy with your Saturday morning tea, grab the mag. But if you aren’t reading those magazines, or just flipping through them quickly because you bought them – so there’s no really pleasure – stop buying. You need to go without for a while so you can reset your pleasure meter.
Being able to take pleasure from the things money can buy is part of having a balanced financial life. Don’t take the desire to enjoy too far and you can keep enjoying for a long time. And if you have to forgo a treat for a couple of weeks because things are a little tight, your pleasure will be all the sweeter the next time you indulge.
September 9, 2011 at 6:31 am
Thank you, thank you, thank you! I’ve been out of consumer debt for years, built a 9 month emergency fund and been aggressively paying off the mortgage. I still feel very guilty spending money on pleasures and realize it is the result of living with austerity for so long.
Found out recently that there will be a relatively small (1.5k) special assessment fee on the condo. My first instinct was to panic and cancel a few upcoming planned indulgences, but then I realized the money was easily available in the day-to-day savings account.
All those years of planning and being careful have paid off. The reward and benefit can extend past “a good night’s sleep” into enjoyment of reasonable pleasures. Thanks Gail for the reminder!
September 9, 2011 at 6:56 am
A good chunk of my discretionary budget is set aside for pleasures – a fancy coffee, a lunch out with co-workers, a nice dinner with my sweetie, or a great bottle of wine. Hmm – interesting how many of my pleasures involve food and drink
I’ve always believed in treating yourself as well as you can afford to. I do of course take care of the basics as well – I’ve got a budget, I track my spending, I’m paying down debt quickly and I’m slowly building an emergency fund. My problem is going over budget on this pleasure line item – never disastrously, but it happens regularly and it’s something I need to watch!
September 9, 2011 at 7:15 am
When I have a little extra, which is not often, I like to treat my family and friends (who also don’t often have extra). Especially my poor student brother. I’ll fill a box of essentials for him, tp, bread, etc.
September 9, 2011 at 7:37 am
I can’t wait until I can include a pleasure line in my budget. For now, I’ll continue to chip away at my debt and build my emergency savings…
September 9, 2011 at 8:24 am
I have a specific line in my budget called Restaurant. It is separate from Groceries. Going out to eat is also one of our big pleasure. It’s really our Entertainment budget, but we really only spend it on going out to eat. I love to go to out to eat for things I can’t/won’t make at home. A lot of ethnic foods/time consuming to make/fried foods.
Another one I just added to my budget this year is called Memories. This is for things like those professionally done family pictures or keepsakes, family reunions, etc. They are definitely nice to have and not essentials. However, you never know if something will happen to someone in your family. At least you will have memories.
PS> One tip I have to make the budget stretch in the Restaurant budget is to leave the kids at home. We try to only go out to eat when it’s just the two of us (as a date). Our kids are too small to appreciate/enjoy/remember the meal out. Plus usually it’s more work than it’s worth it to go out to eat with the kids. We also try to go out to places that we know the kids wouldn’t enjoy anyway.
September 9, 2011 at 9:05 am
I think of pleasures as little rewards. If you have no consumer debt, have a good EF, and savings are all in place, you deserve little rewards for working hard, or just because you’re you. I like pleasures that involve others as well as those just for me. These little things are separate from big pleasures that come from the future plans fund.
September 9, 2011 at 9:16 am
I don’t have a specific “pleasures” category, although i do have a restaurants category that is separate from groceries. However, I have all my budget categories set up (which includes extra mortgage pymts, RRSP, RESP, EMERG Fund) and all other essentials…whatever money is left over, I will allow myself, or our family to indulge if we like. If there is money left over that is not spent, it is transferred to our family vacation fund so that we can have a larger indulgence at a later point!
September 9, 2011 at 9:19 am
I totally struggle with allowing a bit of purchased pleasure into our lives. I’m such a die-hard saver type that it just feels wrong to spend on indulgences when I could squirrel away that $10. Since we’re still in the building our savings phase, it’s probably good that the indulgences are few and far between but it’s good for people like me to be reminded that it’s okay to indulge now and then!
September 9, 2011 at 9:25 am
@ib – as much as love restaurants too, we have to tote our kids because babysitting costs are more than a kids’ meal. Rather we let them eat from our plate. This way the kids don’t become picky eaters of just hamburgers and chicken fingers (which tend to be on the kids menu) or if my entree comes with a changeable side (like mac and cheese) at no extra cost, i offer it to them. Giving a third away of my food also helps me with portion control because some restaurants give too much food. Another thing we do is enjoy the lunch version at a restaurant. It’s normally cheaper, served faster and smaller portions. As a person who is trying to lose baby weight, this really helps. plus the lunch crowd tends to be slightly more casual than a dinner crowd. we want to enjoy the restaurant experience but I am sure the other patrons do as well.
September 9, 2011 at 10:48 am
I have certainly struggled with this one. We paid off our own mortgage, then bought several rental properties, and I just started treating those mortgages as consumer debt. Gail gave me great advice to make an indulgence category and anything I didn’t spend had to be donated, but that didn’t last for me – I just waited until I couldn’t take it anymore and made a lump sum payment on a mortgage.
I think there could be a new show called “Open that Wallet – You Tight-Fisted Scrooge”. I’m much better now, but I do have to keep reminding myself not to think of every single thing in terms of value for dollar because very few things are actually worth what they cost to me.
September 9, 2011 at 11:19 am
It will be awhile before ‘Pleasures’ finds it’s way back into our budget! Luckily I get pleasure from paying down a chunk of debt. Just got out of $1500 OD last week, never to return. One car loan is two payments from paid off, one car loan still to go. One CC paid off, one to go. We switched our mortgage to bi-weekly and started paying 15% more per payment. Since we made an ‘oops’ and only put down 5%, we want to own at least 20% as soon as possible. The changes reduced our amortization by more than a decade. We’ve decided to live on one income for the next three years while I go back to school for an HR Management Diploma during the evenings and weekends. That will allow me to stay home with our little guys until they start school. We have a solid plan to pay off our remaining debt while I’m in school, plus save the Tuition before each semester. We are socking away 250$ per pay to cover the costs. So by the time I graduate and settle into my career, we’ll be debt free aside from our mortgage and we’ll be used to living inside one income. Maybe then ‘pleasures’ will find a small spot on the budget! Right after the big spots for long-term savings and home reno fund!!
September 9, 2011 at 11:52 am
@ Karen – I totally agree about the babysitting cost. We are super lucky that my parents will take the kids on some Saturdays. This is when my husband and I go around doing our grocery errands and go out for lunch. Lunch is definitely way cheaper than dinner, so you can stretch that budget a little bit yet.
I usually will only eat 1/2 of my plate and my husband 3/4 of his plate when we go out. Then we combine get the rest for a doggie bag. It is someone’s lunch the next day.
September 9, 2011 at 12:05 pm
I’ve always been able to squeak by (or better) even when things were tight. I don’t have a “pleasures” category exactly, but I have a minimum line that if I go over that, I know I can indulge occassionally. I keep from being deprived by asking for gifts or gift certificates from very specific types of places that are my favourite places to splurge… massage, books, organic market, chocolate, etc… It guarantees I get a gift I will enjoy, takes it off my budget and makes gift buying easy for my loved ones. (I give enough options that the gift can be a surprise still)
September 9, 2011 at 12:26 pm
I don’t have a pleasure budget but it sounds interesting. I will have to look over the budget and see where I can fit this pleasure in. My pleasure is getting pedicures and would like to try a facial. Will work it in somehow. Thanks Gail. Mother of two and at times I forget about me, I shall look into it more. I am happy to have school snacks for my son and his friends that do come over and I am happy to have bought him school clothes. My pleasrue is to see my children happy too….:)
September 9, 2011 at 12:43 pm
Thanks for this post Gail. I have some issues when I want to spend a chunk of money, I angst and drive the people around me crazy. I think that it is because I fear falling back into debt, a ‘place’ I haven’t been in over 10 years. I do allow myself my little pleasures that I pay for out of my allowance [and I don't track it because that is one of my rewards/pleasures]
Fern
P.S. I love your “Debtonator” persona
September 9, 2011 at 1:21 pm
Thank you for giving permission for a ‘pleasures’ category in our personal budget without feeling like a ‘Princess’.
My mother, scottish roots, always made me feel guilty about buying frivolous things when I was getting an allowance as a kid or when working my first job as a teenager. The side effect was me being very budget conscious throughout my life, and always looking for other ways to save money. I’ve never borrowed money from anyone (besides a mortgage), not even for going to university (I’m working on my Masters now) and never plan on it either. I still have money go traveling with my husband, save for our retirement, or for a rainy day.
I still feel guilty buying non-essential items, but sometimes you just miss out on life that way. Thanks for reassurance Gail that we’re not going to He** if we spend money on some of the fun things in life.
September 9, 2011 at 1:29 pm
I love the idea of putting a separate line for pleasures! normally i draw mine from food, entertainment, clothing or other. but there are often little things that don’t really fit into the category, like painting supplies, yoga, or nice things for the home. two categories i think i will add will be “pleasures” as well as “health”.
budgeting helps reduce the guilt sooo much. i’ve been living on a budget and writing down everything i spend for over 2 years now and it has helped me so much. i’m at a point where i can enjoy myself AND know that the important stuff is being taken care of and it feels great.
September 9, 2011 at 2:38 pm
I love this idea!!!! because the occasional massage, premium beer, or dinner out can make all the difference, and having it budgeted, takes the stress away.
as of today, I am CC debt free, offically!!! just our mortgage and 1 car payment to go. Feels great!
September 10, 2011 at 11:20 am
I don’t have a certain “pleasure” category in my budget but I do give myself an allowance every payday which I use for anything not accounted for in the budget. Once all my essentials are distributed (house account, grocery, savings etc) I give myself an allowance and put the rest into my planned spending account (saving for a camper!). My allowance HAS to last me until the next payday and if its gone then its gone….at least I know I will still eat and have the essentials covered. It covers all my clothing and gifts too so if I have a wedding to attend then it has to cover all costs…but if I just want to spend it on starbucks and magazines then I can do that too.
September 10, 2011 at 7:27 pm
Nice article. I think you are right. We shouldn’t have to feel guilty to spend a little on pleasure items so long as we have all our ducks in a row. All too often I have found myself being way too cheap when there was no reason to be. Thanks for the reminder!
September 12, 2011 at 1:27 pm
Years ago I read a book called “Living a Beautiful Life” written by a decorator, who mainly talked about the little things in life making a difference. She had noticed that most people would spend all their money on their public rooms and no money on, say, their bedrooms.
Having tea in a beautiful cup, washing with a luxurious soap or shower gel, buying one cashmere sweater all make for an enjoyable day. My own Scots background forces me to wait for a sale, but now I have crystal glasses — the wine DOES taste better in them! — and Frette sheets.
September 12, 2011 at 9:51 pm
It was hard to finally allow us to spend money once we became debt free earlier this year. We seem to have gotten over that now and need to pull things back a tad. We have had the money for everything we purchased so it isn’t a bad thing… we just have some other plans for the cash that we need to focus on now.
September 13, 2011 at 6:41 am
Congratulations Lori!!!
I look forward to when I can add a pleasures line to my budget. But right now my christmas jar is my source of pleasure! Guilt free spending (that I saved up for) for my loved ones! It doesn’t get much better than that!
September 13, 2011 at 10:09 am
After you have finished disbursing your income on payday to fill up all the categories, and you sit down and see what is left for the next 2 weeks, it can get a little discouraging. I believe a pleasures line will be added to my budget this next pay period. I too take great pleasure in having my Christmas account available too.
Almost paid off the LOC, extra payments going to the mortgage, one investment LOC to go, then we will need to rejig the budget to reflect the extra income.
September 19, 2011 at 4:16 pm
Great article. If you work hard to keep on budget you should definitely reward yourself in the end.
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