Leah, This One’s for You!
Posted by Gail | Filed under Getting Married?
I received a letter recently from a mom whose daughter is getting married shortly. She wanted to hire me to give her daughter a crash-course in money and life before the wedding. It got me thinking about what’s available out there in terms of advice for the soon-to-be-wed. So I took a look around. Sad to say, the information is patchy. Long on big, sweeping statements. Short on details, and even shorter on common sense.
I got to thinking about what I’d say to Leah if we had a chance to sit and chat. The result is a series of articles I’m putting up today to help people who are getting married to think about their money, their lives together, and how to plan for both.
Here’s a list of what I’ve got for you
To Consolidate or Not to Consolidate?
The worksheet not only shows you what people spend on average for the various parts of their wedding, but it lets you estimate what you think you’ll spend and then record what you actually spent so that you can see how on- or off-track you are.
Now, you can choose not to use the budget worksheet. After all, this is a magical day, a day of dreams-come-true. You CAN have it all!
And then you can pay for it for a b’zillion years. You can give up on owning a home, delay having children, pay scads and scads of money in interest and wonder what the hell you were thinking when five years later you’re still not finished paying off your magical day, your dream-come-true.
Have you seen all those shows about brides-gone-nuts? Is that what you think a wedding should be about?
My husband has a theory that people get married in front of dozens or hundreds of people so that they’ll feel the social pressure to stay together. If that’s why you’re having a big wedding, bank the money to pay for the divorce.
If you’re having a big wedding to make your parents happy, tell them to pay for the party.
If you’re having a big wedding so you can party until 3 a.m., get polluted without guilt, and make a general dope of yourself, have fun with that!
And if you’re having a big wedding because you just wanna, and you can afford it – there’s absolutely no debt involved and you already own your home – then go for it.
But if you’re going to be left with even fifty cents of debt, you’re an idiot and your partner should run screaming from the room right now. Go. Run. After all, who goes into debt for a fricken party?
Since I don’t want to be a wet blanket, I’ve said all I’m going to say about have a big, flashy, EXPENSIVE wedding. It’s your life and you gotta do what you gotta do.
BTW Leah, your mom sure does love you. She went through hoops to contact me and was very persistent. You’re a lucky girl. I hope you have a wonderful wedding, that all your dreams come true, and that you remember that everything that happens to us is a blessing because it makes us grow. Keep growing.
kisses, g
February 12, 2008 at 11:35 am
You show the avg cost in the wedding budget worksheet…how many people does this avg cost include? There is a big difference if the costs are based on 100 guests vs 200 guests! Thanks Gail…love the show and looking forward to the seminar at the Royal York.
February 12, 2008 at 11:37 am
It’s based on 150 guests.