Comments on: Who’s In Charge Here? http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 11:17:54 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Shannon http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25950 Shannon Sat, 13 Feb 2010 22:50:24 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25950 You're right, Gail. I need to whine less, get over myself, and be more of a woman of action. To that end, I commit to finding out what my credit score is and to finish researching TFSA/RRSP options by the end of the month. I commit to having the TFSA/RRSP set up in time to get an auto-withdrawal from my first March pay cheque. At that point, it'll probably be my turn for your book at the public library and I hear there's lots of good homework in there so working through that will be my next step. Thanks again. (p.s. I managed to get a copy of the Costco magazine you were in recently and I've posted the page that has the picture of you and the words "Tough Love" on my fridge to help keep me honest in my efforts) You’re right, Gail. I need to whine less, get over myself, and be more of a woman of action. To that end, I commit to finding out what my credit score is and to finish researching TFSA/RRSP options by the end of the month. I commit to having the TFSA/RRSP set up in time to get an auto-withdrawal from my first March pay cheque. At that point, it’ll probably be my turn for your book at the public library and I hear there’s lots of good homework in there so working through that will be my next step.

Thanks again.

(p.s. I managed to get a copy of the Costco magazine you were in recently and I’ve posted the page that has the picture of you and the words “Tough Love” on my fridge to help keep me honest in my efforts)

]]> By: Sue http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25891 Sue Fri, 12 Feb 2010 23:44:14 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25891 I find it interesting that when you start to take control of one area of your life then other areas seem to follow. Notice how people are saying now I'm eating healthier, losing weight and others are going to tackle the clutter. I have found the same experience and even though it's hard to delay the gratification in the end it's so well worth it. Gail is so wise as she's combined her financial savvy with the human experience and that's what gets results. Thanks Gail! I find it interesting that when you start to take control of one area of your life then other areas seem to follow. Notice how people are saying now I’m eating healthier, losing weight and others are going to tackle the clutter.
I have found the same experience and even though it’s hard to delay the gratification in the end it’s so well worth it.
Gail is so wise as she’s combined her financial savvy with the human experience and that’s what gets results. Thanks Gail!

]]> By: Canadian Personal Finance Blog » Blog Archive » Random Valentine’s Thoughts http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25821 Canadian Personal Finance Blog » Blog Archive » Random Valentine’s Thoughts Fri, 12 Feb 2010 07:01:52 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25821 [...] Gail Vaz-Oxlade encourages her readers not to have a Victim’s Mentality in her post Who’s In Charge Here? [...] [...] Gail Vaz-Oxlade encourages her readers not to have a Victim’s Mentality in her post Who’s In Charge Here? [...]

]]> By: Kate http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25810 Kate Fri, 12 Feb 2010 03:43:02 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25810 I work with a woman that is a 'victim'. Anything bad that happens is something that is being done 'to' her. One thing that never occurs to her is that a lot of the time, she has made bad choices that have put her in that situation. I work with a woman that is a ‘victim’. Anything bad that happens is something that is being done ‘to’ her. One thing that never occurs to her is that a lot of the time, she has made bad choices that have put her in that situation.

]]> By: MP http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25808 MP Fri, 12 Feb 2010 01:49:35 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25808 I de-cluttered at work to take control of my work day. I find things faster now. I waste less time as a result and am more productive. Now I'm trying to de-clutter my house of 20 years of clutter...this is all after I took control of my financial life, learned lessons and tips from Gail and now am well on the way to an emergency fund worth 9 months of expenses without any income in or cut in variable spending. Thanks Gail! I de-cluttered at work to take control of my work day. I find things faster now. I waste less time as a result and am more productive. Now I’m trying to de-clutter my house of 20 years of clutter…this is all after I took control of my financial life, learned lessons and tips from Gail and now am well on the way to an emergency fund worth 9 months of expenses without any income in or cut in variable spending. Thanks Gail!

]]> By: *pol http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25797 *pol Thu, 11 Feb 2010 22:20:04 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25797 I am lucky to have had a strong role-model in my mom. She may have stumbled financially a few times, but she has NEVER let herself be a victim of circumstance. In her career, relationships and home, she is at the helm of her own life. And when Ca-Ca hits the fan, she has the sense to know who's fault it is when she finds herself in front of it! Likewise, she doesn't expect anyone to clean up for her, she always takes control to fix it herself through awareness and education. Every action has consequences. Making sure you know the risks before you leap into a decision is always smart. But don't paralyze yourself by not doing anything either... awareness and education are important in all aspects of life, no matter how peachy it has been handed to you up to this point! I am lucky to have had a strong role-model in my mom. She may have stumbled financially a few times, but she has NEVER let herself be a victim of circumstance. In her career, relationships and home, she is at the helm of her own life. And when Ca-Ca hits the fan, she has the sense to know who’s fault it is when she finds herself in front of it! Likewise, she doesn’t expect anyone to clean up for her, she always takes control to fix it herself through awareness and education.

Every action has consequences. Making sure you know the risks before you leap into a decision is always smart. But don’t paralyze yourself by not doing anything either… awareness and education are important in all aspects of life, no matter how peachy it has been handed to you up to this point!

]]> By: inge http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25796 inge Thu, 11 Feb 2010 22:18:50 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25796 Diane, good luck with your clutter! What Amelia says, de-cluttering can really make you feel powerful and in control. You feel the space around you becoming larger, and entropy receding. Also, decluttering gets you in the right frame of mind to live below your means: you look at the clutter and think, "I spent good money on *that*? What was I thinking?", which is a tremendous help when you are tempted to spend money on some future clutter. Diane, good luck with your clutter! What Amelia says, de-cluttering can really make you feel powerful and in control. You feel the space around you becoming larger, and entropy receding. Also, decluttering gets you in the right frame of mind to live below your means: you look at the clutter and think, “I spent good money on *that*? What was I thinking?”, which is a tremendous help when you are tempted to spend money on some future clutter.

]]> By: Tara http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25795 Tara Thu, 11 Feb 2010 22:16:38 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25795 Well, we aren't ever fully in control of our lives, but the best we can do is prepare and save. I decided this year is the year I'm going to finally be debt-free, and I'm determined to have the CC paid off by December 31st. I've written out my budget and I'm going to get there! My long term goal is to think about what I want my next career to be like. I'm moving to a new city in 2012 and thinking about what I need to do to prepare for that. Save and get some extra training are at the top of my list. Well, we aren’t ever fully in control of our lives, but the best we can do is prepare and save. I decided this year is the year I’m going to finally be debt-free, and I’m determined to have the CC paid off by December 31st. I’ve written out my budget and I’m going to get there! My long term goal is to think about what I want my next career to be like. I’m moving to a new city in 2012 and thinking about what I need to do to prepare for that. Save and get some extra training are at the top of my list.

]]> By: Marie http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25791 Marie Thu, 11 Feb 2010 20:14:41 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25791 Life under control? Make a list with THREE columns. 1- What I can control (organise budget, follow budget, organise time, do my best at work, ...) 2- What I have limited control over (health, downsizing at work, illness in family, what kids will do, vandalism, ...) Note: leave a few rows between each of these item, you'll see why... 3- What I can do to prepare in case anything in column #2 comes up (different forms of insurance, emergency fund, will, living will, ...) Note: line up every option in column that helps you prepare for events in C #2) Note 2: There might be items in column #2 that have limited preparation. Then you have done the best you can and are ready for life events. The victim is ready. People only want to hear you whine for so long. Does sh*t happen to me? Yes. Will I whine about it? Ok, I'll admit that yes, I will whine. What am I willing to do about it? Prep the best I can (and have a bit of fun too). Life under control?
Make a list with THREE columns.
1- What I can control
(organise budget, follow budget, organise time, do my best at work, …)
2- What I have limited control over
(health, downsizing at work, illness in family, what kids will do, vandalism, …)
Note: leave a few rows between each of these item, you’ll see why…
3- What I can do to prepare in case anything in column #2 comes up
(different forms of insurance, emergency fund, will, living will, …)
Note: line up every option in column that helps you prepare for events in C #2)
Note 2: There might be items in column #2 that have limited preparation.
Then you have done the best you can and are ready for life events. The victim is ready. People only want to hear you whine for so long.
Does sh*t happen to me? Yes. Will I whine about it? Ok, I’ll admit that yes, I will whine. What am I willing to do about it? Prep the best I can (and have a bit of fun too).

]]> By: Sharon http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25790 Sharon Thu, 11 Feb 2010 19:56:48 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25790 I have to admit that i resemble Petra in a lot of ways. Thankfully, I have started this year with a budget. Last year, I was tracking our bill payments and debt levels using paper and pen, this year I also have a spreadsheet that is more accurate, and self-adding :) Thank-you Gail for having so much information and inspiration available. I have to admit that i resemble Petra in a lot of ways. Thankfully, I have started this year with a budget. Last year, I was tracking our bill payments and debt levels using paper and pen, this year I also have a spreadsheet that is more accurate, and self-adding :) Thank-you Gail for having so much information and inspiration available.

]]> By: Manisha http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25788 Manisha Thu, 11 Feb 2010 19:51:18 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25788 Taking charge and making little changes has really made a difference for me. 3 years ago I decided to stop buying lunch during the workweek. I saved the money plus I was noticeably healthier. 2 years ago I decided to fill up my car with gas at the beginning of the week and fill it up the whole way. Ok, I know it sounds like a pointless change, but this instantly eliminated a whole lot of stress for me. I didn't have to worry about filling up part way through the week on the way to work, or an important appointment and it made my life so much easier. Last year we stopped eating out several times a week and that has made a huge change in our savings. The best thing about it, isn't just saving the money, but that feeling of "taking charge" that Gail is talking about. Taking charge and making little changes has really made a difference for me. 3 years ago I decided to stop buying lunch during the workweek. I saved the money plus I was noticeably healthier. 2 years ago I decided to fill up my car with gas at the beginning of the week and fill it up the whole way. Ok, I know it sounds like a pointless change, but this instantly eliminated a whole lot of stress for me. I didn’t have to worry about filling up part way through the week on the way to work, or an important appointment and it made my life so much easier. Last year we stopped eating out several times a week and that has made a huge change in our savings. The best thing about it, isn’t just saving the money, but that feeling of “taking charge” that Gail is talking about.

]]> By: Iryssa http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25785 Iryssa Thu, 11 Feb 2010 19:02:18 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25785 I started to take charge of my life when I started watching TDDUP, Gail. Big thank-you! ((((hugs))))) What a difference, too. I feel so much more confident that I can achieve my goals. Stuff doesn't "just happen" to me anymore. I do things to keep myself and my family safe. I'm saving now, for instance. It's not much, but every month I save just a little more, and I'm seeing it grow more and more quickly. Part of the change was realizing how much I didn't know (your show helped me enormously there). I'm a fairly resourceful person, so I'm good about doing my own research, but when you don't know WHAT you don't know, it's a lot harder to do. Now I know what resources I need and I've been passing them on to my friends. I'm thinking I'll buy my friend (also a victim mentality type) A Woman of Independant Means for her birthday. Actually, I might buy that for ALL my friends. Maybe it'll encourage her to independance (I've been finding it very empowering). I started to take charge of my life when I started watching TDDUP, Gail. Big thank-you! ((((hugs)))))

What a difference, too. I feel so much more confident that I can achieve my goals. Stuff doesn’t “just happen” to me anymore. I do things to keep myself and my family safe. I’m saving now, for instance. It’s not much, but every month I save just a little more, and I’m seeing it grow more and more quickly. Part of the change was realizing how much I didn’t know (your show helped me enormously there). I’m a fairly resourceful person, so I’m good about doing my own research, but when you don’t know WHAT you don’t know, it’s a lot harder to do. Now I know what resources I need and I’ve been passing them on to my friends.

I’m thinking I’ll buy my friend (also a victim mentality type) A Woman of Independant Means for her birthday. Actually, I might buy that for ALL my friends. Maybe it’ll encourage her to independance (I’ve been finding it very empowering).

]]> By: Doreen http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25783 Doreen Thu, 11 Feb 2010 18:34:49 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25783 Ah yes - the 'how did this happen to me' syndrome. Same thing happen to me years back. I remember when I was a new home owner and looked at my first mortgage statement. I saw 'red' when I realized in black & white that I had paid MORE in interest than in principal. That's when I became determined to pay that debt off ASAP. A similar thing happened with my RRSP savings. I had been sold a 'crock of crap' (as our fearless guide, Gail, might say) and after paying the financial analyst their fee, had lost -6% or so that year. So that's when I got books and got educated on how to manage my own money. This 'take charge' attitude helped me a lot one summer (maybe 2 yrs back now) when I saw my kids' RESPs were losing $ - so I moved everything into GICs. This year one GIC came due at 4.11% interest - compared to what I can get today on a GIC - 1% - if I'm lucky. Yes - get mad and get education and by all means - take charge of your own monies. Ah yes – the ‘how did this happen to me’ syndrome. Same thing happen to me years back. I remember when I was a new home owner and looked at my first mortgage statement. I saw ‘red’ when I realized in black & white that I had paid MORE in interest than in principal. That’s when I became determined to pay that debt off ASAP.

A similar thing happened with my RRSP savings. I had been sold a ‘crock of crap’ (as our fearless guide, Gail, might say) and after paying the financial analyst their fee, had lost -6% or so that year. So that’s when I got books and got educated on how to manage my own money. This ‘take charge’ attitude helped me a lot one summer (maybe 2 yrs back now) when I saw my kids’ RESPs were losing $ – so I moved everything into GICs. This year one GIC came due at 4.11% interest – compared to what I can get today on a GIC – 1% – if I’m lucky. Yes – get mad and get education and by all means – take charge of your own monies.

]]> By: Hollie http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25780 Hollie Thu, 11 Feb 2010 17:53:42 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25780 Gail, thanks for this post, really you could substitute my name with Petra's especially if you read my post from today. I was wondering if you could comment and let me know what you would do. http://commoncentsmom.com/2010/02/11/what-would-you-do/ Gail,
thanks for this post, really you could substitute my name with Petra’s especially if you read my post from today.

I was wondering if you could comment and let me know what you would do.

http://commoncentsmom.com/2010/02/11/what-would-you-do/

]]> By: Jason http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/archives/1460/comment-page-1#comment-25779 Jason Thu, 11 Feb 2010 17:38:08 +0000 http://gailvazoxlade.com/blog/?p=1460#comment-25779 I know I'm my own worst enemy but I've accepted that. I hate it when people come across thinking that they are in this situation because of anyone else but themselves. Sure outside influences can happen but it's all in the way you handle them. To start the huge process of climbing out of debt I had to first accept responsibility. regards, Jason I know I’m my own worst enemy but I’ve accepted that. I hate it when people come across thinking that they are in this situation because of anyone else but themselves. Sure outside influences can happen but it’s all in the way you handle them. To start the huge process of climbing out of debt I had to first accept responsibility.

regards,

Jason

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