Comments on: Are You Spending to Impress?

By: Improve Gas Mileage Guide

Improve Gas Mileage Guide — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 18:48:12 +0000

I’m always quoting Gail from the episode where she says, “nothing matters less than what car’s in your driveway.”

The first step in getting your finances under control is to stop spending to impress. Drive a fuel efficient car instead of one that turns heads – better for your wallet and the environment.

By: lili

lili — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 07:29:14 +0000

I’m downsizing from a 750 square foot to a 400 square foot condo in two years and I can’t be more excited about getting rid of my stuff! My current 750 square foot place is too big for me because I can barely fill the den and my storage space! I know the 400 square foot condo will force me to buy less junk, decline junk others give to me (sorry, Auntie, but my kitchen is too small for several Christmas Santa candy containers!) and possibly make life difficult if my boyfriend moves in or I end up having a baby but I really think it will be worthwhile and stop the small urge for consumption that I have.

By: AnnieA

AnnieA — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 21:13:16 +0000

What Jenn said resonated with me: I often feel a little tense when I receive a gift, as I live in a small place with little storage space (and am evidently hard to shop for). I am a big fan of passing things along, although I worry about eventually giving a gift back to the original giver.

One friend absolutely has to keep every gift she’s ever been given. She is is drowning in stuff, so I might switch to gifts of food or wine for her…

By: Anne

Anne — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 00:30:02 +0000

I have to admit I do spend to impress – to impress me! It feels great to take extra money left over one month and buy books, stationary supplies, or pay a magazine subscription. Every time I pick up one of these thing I feel impressed at myself for having picked myself up a few years ago from a financial “I have no idea where I’m going” to “I know what I want and where I am going”. Being on disability I don’t have a lot of money to work with, but I’m making it and saving a little in investments, a trip to disney, and on final resting place. A little goes a long way. A little over time really adds up (thats how I bought this computer last spring – my bank manager was as excited and impressed as I was). And the little things I am able to do or get debt free do impress me. I feel a warm pride, and smile when I use my new colorful stick it notes for example. It feels a little strange saying this publicly, but its the truth.

By: John

John — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 14:06:00 +0000

I don’t spend to impress.
I spend to get what gives me the most value for my dollar.
I bought a new pair of dress of shoes a few weeks ago…$279.00 cash different colour black now.
The the last pair I bought the same brand and line was in 1990.
I had them resoled and healed for $40.00
They get shoes trees to when not in use always.
I use blue colour uniform clothes around the house, and for all casual dress and to work.
They last forever.
I bought 4 brand new uniform shirts for $18.00 recently the guy didn’t have his job and had opened them and wore them for a week.
My suits are all redone and tailored to me($80 a pop max.) after I find them for $20-40 dollars at the very max if real expensive cloth in thrift stores, garage sales.
One suit my wife can’t believe all the comments about how nice it looks.
The big joke is the wives ask her how much did i pay for it?
She says he found it along the 401 at an exit.
That suit you can’t get for under $1400.00 if you know suits and their cloth.

By: moneymagnet

moneymagnet — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 22:45:10 +0000

I’ve also read “Your Money or Your Life” – and it was an eye opener and definitely had an impact on my lifestyle. I have reached a point in my life where I don’t need any more stuff. Our family also no longer buys for the adults, only for the little ones at Christmas time. An ex-boyfriend of mine always impressed me because he lived in a ‘typical’ bachelor pad with minimal furnishings and half a closet full of clothes. Having not a lot of stuff just makes life so easy. The simple chore of getting ready for work in the morning is so uncomplicated when you only have 10 shirts and 4 pairs of pants. I often times stand in front of the closet trying to figure out what to wear because it’s jammed full with way too much. So, I now regularly donate ‘old’ clothes to charity. I never been one for big ticket items – don’t need the fanciest, newest gadgets – if you wait long enough – the price drastically drops as the item is replaced by something newer and fancier and more pricey. I’d much rather drop a few bucks on a great vacation than acquire more stuff.

By: Rita

Rita — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 04:11:18 +0000

A few years back I went for lunch with a schoolmate who’d been a good friend in elementary & junior high, but who had moved away when she went to university. Her entire conversation revolved around material things: money, position, and how impressed she was by a fellow schoolmate’s house that she’d just seen. It was one of the most uncomfortable, boring conversations I’d ever had. Where was the level- headed girl I’d once known?

Ironically, a few weeks later I ran across the schoolmate whose house she’d been so impressed with. What did we discuss? Family, our gardens, favorite plants and the best forms of mulch to use. Yes, she had done well, but she never mentioned any of her possessions, she was still the down to earth person I’d known since grade 5. We had a wonderful visit. I haven’t seen the first friend since then but I hope she has outgrown the need to impress and be impressed by Stuff.

I’ve always preferred to travel and to experience other cultures than to have the latest things. Which is my cars last me for 15 years and my tv is at least 20 years old. Yes, I like nice clothes but I could care less about designer labels. Stuff wears out, stuff is outdated the minute you buy it. Sharing time with family and friends is so much more satisfying. In the end it’s the experiences we’ve had/shared that remain in our memories, not the stuff we bought.

By: Sarah F.

Sarah F. — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 02:09:52 +0000

Can you imagine being among a group of friends who do not spend their time showing off their new shoes and accepting the “oohs” and “aahs” that are the social requirement?

I sure can and I hang out with every chance I get! Funny though they are a group of guys.. my husbands friends originally and now “our” friends I love knowing I can go out to their place in my wood shirt & torn up jeans and no one cares. All there just to have a good time

By: MP

MP — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 01:34:29 +0000

My mother downsized and moved into an apartment last year. She clearly didn’t need anymore stuff since she gave her stuff to me….so instead of stuff, I began buying tickets to the theatre, plays, museums etc. for us to go to together. She loves it and thinks it’s great since we get to spend so little time together as it is with my very high pressured, lots of business travel job. I’m thinking of starting the same thing with my young nieces, since they really don’t need stuff with two sets of doting grandparents!

By: Manisha

Manisha — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 22:12:09 +0000

Adriane’s comment reminds me of my own experience. I worked through university as a Specialist for a variety of Designers, which meant I had to maintain a very high end wardrobe and lifestyle, and often had to have the first of this bag or those shoes and had to be at opening night for this restaurant or exhibit, to stay “competitive” in the industry and stay “in the know.” This was a common practise in the industry and expected of most employees. After University, I left my old career to pursue something in my chosen field and everything changed. My colleagues, all highly educated and respectable, weren’t the most fashionable.

So, over the last five years in my new profession, it has truly been LIBERATING to let it all go. And it has been so easy! People often ask me why I left such an exciting job for something less glamorous and I tell people it was a lifestyle choice. And it really was; aside from earning more, the amount of time and energy I have saved myself is incredible, plus its totally eliminated a large amount of stress all because I am not shopping as much and trying to acquire things so often and since I’m buying less designer goods than before I am saving a lot more money too.

By: Amber

Amber — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 22:10:09 +0000

I read ‘Your Money or Your Life’ a couple of years ago, too, and I loved it. I loved the way that it laid it out so plainly. You don’t need as much as you think you do. And buying all of that is a trade-off, because it means you need to spend the time to work for it. I haven’t been as diligent about following the 9 steps as I could be, but I have gained great value from the book nonetheless.

I think that I am lucky to have a lot of friends in the same position as I am. We have small kids, and we want to spend time with them. So we make trade-offs. We buy stuff second hand, or just avoid buying stuff altogether. We visit the library and the playground a lot. Having that support network with the same goals is so, so valuable, and I’m really very glad to have it.

By: Jane

Jane — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:58:30 +0000

I read Your Money or Your Life and more recently, Why Swim with the Sharks. Both excellent. One thing I’m still wrapping my head around is the Life part. I’ve got to a point in my life where I have a nice balance between time and money (by being frugal, not by earning a great deal), and I’ve had to start developing my definition of a rich, rewarding life. In many ways, it’s easier to buy the rich, rewarding life we’re being sold than to try to figure out what it means for ourselves (I think).
I find that I’ve let many friends go, as once the frequent social outings masquerading as relationships stopped, I gradually discovered that I didn’t have much in common with several of them.
Still, I’m having fun developing some hobbies, volunteering just a little bit, and enjoying the quiet. No way is mall culture going to take this away from me.

By: Didi

Didi — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:47:42 +0000

We had stopped buying Christmas gifts for each other (adults anyways) for years now.. we just don’t need anything! This year my husband and I have decided also to get the kids in the family gift cards to their favourite stores since they are all getting older and really would love to choose their own items. Christmas (while a lovely holiday with family) has ALWAYS been stressful for me. When those lights go up so does my blood pressure! I’m so glad that we have simplified things this year and I’m looking forward to just spending time with my family and enjoying it! Thanks Gail for a wonderful post. I’m going to have to pick up that book “your money or your life” I keep hearing about it on all sorts of frugality sites. Have a great weekend everyone!

By: Amelia

Amelia — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:08:25 +0000

I’m with Big Cajun Man, if you cooked and it was tasty, I’d be impressed. I hate cooking. I’m also with Dana about Christmas, I still buy everyone something, but it’s soap. They all tease me but hey, everyone needs laundry detergent and sos pads. My brother rose to my defense when he got his first apartment and his box of sos pads from me. He said he needed the stuff but it wasn’t in his budget. I believe he also learned the word budget from me.

By: Megan

Megan — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 19:47:11 +0000

I have to deal with this ALOT. It seems as though my generation (20 somethings) is really caught up with material possessions! And it drives me mad!
My best friend is the bad for this, granted he makes a good salary but its always about the new vehicle he is going to lease, the new reno they are doing, the new trip they are taking. I think over time he is getting better though because I don’t do this back and he recently has learned of my financial philosophy in life. My cousins are the worst for this though. For some reason they have felt the need to compete with one another (3 adult women) all their lives. One of them can afford all the goodies they purchase, the other two however are drowning themselves in debt to keep up. Since I see the huge amounts of stress and hostility it causes them I am very thankful that I do not have this relationship with my siblings. If they get a new car or go on a fancy trip I am happy for them because they both went to University for 7 years and are not going into debt doing it.